


The Shape of Stardust

by sleepy_cryptid



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, First Contact, I broke my own heart, Injury Recovery, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Sign Language, Soulmate AU, Tessa is a mess, The Shape of Water AU no one asked for, mute character, or at least references to soulmates from a cultural sense
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-06
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-01-24 10:33:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21336817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sleepy_cryptid/pseuds/sleepy_cryptid
Summary: When a strike team on Voeld recovers alien tech from a Kett base, Jaal is sent to evaluate what has been newly dubbed 'The Asset'. What he finds is not only unexpected but has the potential to turn everything they thought they'd known on its head.Rewritten as of 11/06/2019
Relationships: Jaal Ama Darav/Female Ryder | Sara
Comments: 27
Kudos: 116





	1. A Stranger from the Stars

**Author's Note:**

> I have no excuse for how long this has taken. I struggled A LOT with this rewrite - particularly with how this sort of thing would go. I hope I haven't gone to far with the sympathy shown by the angara here. They're an emotional bunch and I don't think it would be out of the ordinary for them to show as much kindness as I have written here. Of course, not everyone will react like they have. Anyway, here we are, and I kind of hate how this chapter went.

Jaal’s stride was confident if a bit hurried as he made his way through the Resistance headquarters.  This late in Aya’s night cycle the beating heart of the Resistance was a hive of activity, if darker than usual due to most of the lights being dimmed to the absolute bare minimum in a conscious effort to save energy. The luminescence emitted by the various consoles and occasional projections on the walls, however, were more than enough to compensate. It was still as busy as it ever was during the daylight hours; the din of voices a backdrop to the humming of tech. The door slid open with a soft sigh. He swept his eyes over the space before landing on Evfra.

The elder angara was leaning over the large table in the center of the hub, hands curled into fists to prop himself up as he reviewed a large holo-map projected onto the surface. Stress had carved deep lines around his eyes and pinched his lips into a firm line. Not that he had ever truly looked relaxed – at least not in Jaal’s memory – but this seemed different than usual. He lifted his head at Jaal’s approach and waved him over.

“Scouts found a Kett facility on Voeld, 13 or so klicks southeast of Hjara,” he said in lieu of an actual greeting before returning his gaze to the map (Voeld as it turned out) in front of him . He zoomed in, the projection changed from a view of the terrain to a labeled series of video stills. “We sent a strike team to infiltrate and dismantle it. We lost most of the team, but the three that survived found a hidden lab.”

Jaal shifted his weight to a more comfortable stance, brow furrowed as he selected one of the stills. A door, heavily damaged, but clearly kett design filled the space. Something had been jammed into it to keep it open.  There wasn’t much that could be seen beyond the crack of the door besides what looked like a table upon which was an odd silver object.

“What purpose would that serve? They have never done so before,” he replied. “Why would they do so now?”

It didn’t make any sense. They’d never made any attempt to hide their facilities before; in fact, they were rather blatant about their locations, serving as both a warning and a taunt. He himself had lead several missions to wipe out various bases; none of which had made any attempt to conceal just what it was they were doing. Jaal just barely repressed a shiver at the memory.

“To protect this.”

Evfra swiped his finger over the current picture to bring up a short clip featuring the inside of the room itself. It appeared to be from helmet-cam, the operator looked around the room before returning the focus on the table, get a better view of the object on top in full display. They stepped closer, walking around it  slowly  to record it on all sides

It didn’t appear to be kett; the design didn’t match up with their usual aesthetics, nor did it match any sort of remnant tech he’d ever seen. It was longer than it was wide, with a panel near the top of what appeared to be glass, but inside of it  was frosted, obscuring its contents

“This  was found  on Voeld?”  He couldn’t hide the astonishment in his voice as he replayed the clip, pausing and zooming in on details that caught his eye. The tinker in him was instantly interested; this was something new and he wanted to crack it open and see how it worked.

“What is it?”

Evfra shrugged, holding out a hand to the aide who had approached to take a datapad. He gave it a cursory glance, the deep furrow in his brow becoming more prominent. He dismissed the aide and set the datapad to his right where several others waited.

“No idea. It’s been shipped to the labs here on Aya at the Moshae’s request for further study. And I want you to be there when they get it open.”

“Do you think it’s a trap?”

Evfra snorted derisively. “When it comes to the kett, everything is a trap. But if the kett were trying so hard to protect whatever it is, then it is definitely something we want.” He looked up, tapping his fingers against the tabletop. “I’m not taking any chances with it. The Moshae has agreed to your presence. You’re to report to the lab under the repository in two hours. I’m sure it goes without saying that I expect a full report afterward.”

“Understood.”

* * *

“And who are you?”

Jaal blinked at the elderly angara addressing him; he was large for an angara, perhaps a little more so than Jaal.  Judging by his accent he was from Voeld, this assumption supported by the deep blue skin tone common to the planet, with streaks and speckles of white being the only indication of his age.

“No, no, enough of that,” he continued irritably. “I can guess who you are. One of little Sjefa’s students, yes? Yes, I do think so. You’ve all got that look about you. I knew her when she was knee-high to an adhi you know. Back when she was all about science and discovery. Now she plays the politician in the sunlight,” he shuddered as if in disgust. “Not me though! I remember where my roots are. Don’t let anyone say Old Torsaan doesn’t remember his place in the world.” Torsaan jabbed a code into the panel by the door behind him and ushered Jaal forward. “Come now we don’t have all day!”

The two of them took turns in front of the small decontamination console before filing into a crowded lab. Most of the machines strange to him,  all of which showed signs of wear. There were two other techs within, Anvi and Lahren he recalled. Anvi was occupied at a terminal, with Lahren around the large silver object on a table in the center of the room, presumably taking notes. He stepped closer to inspect it.

There was quite a bit of damage.  The worst of it came from the several deep dents on top, with deep gouges made by what looked like tools scored the sides. He brushed his fingertips lightly over the deepest scarring, feeling a nearly invisible seam.

Someone tapped his shoulder. He looked to the left to find the Moshae looking up at him, her head cocked, and the corners of her lips tipped up in a smile.

“Hello, Jaal,” she said after greeting him with an affectionate hug that he returned with equal enthusiasm. “It’s good to see you. It’s been too long.”

“It has,” he agreed. “I must admit, I am surprised to see you here. My sister had said you were back on Havarl assisting with the archeologists.”

“It was decided my presence here was more important.  I regret leaving the team in the middle of such a critical stage of the excavation, but I must confess I agree with the assessment. This is a remarkable discovery.”

“In what way?”

She beckoned him over to a waiting console. “Torsaan, where is that drone of yours?”

Wordlessly, the elderly angara pulled it up, directing it over the waiting object. He waved off her thanks, too occupied by whatever it was that he was pouring over.

“The team that originally discovered it brought it to the lab at Hjara,” the Moshae said as manipulated the screen. “Torsaan was stationed there, studying kett tech. He was able to do some basic tests, but there’s only so much that can be done outside of a proper lab. But he was able to scan it to see what is inside.”

Jaal crossed his arms and watched, leaning comfortably against a supply crate. The Moshae’s current, usually very calm, was crackling with excitement. “Is it dangerous?”

She paused, her shoulders dropping the tiniest bit.

“Not anymore. It would be better to show you.”

Work stopped in the lab as the assembled angara stepped back to watch the proceedings. Her dextrous fingers flew over the console, the drone overhead flashing in response. With a loud beep, a scanner appeared, the purple light sweeping up and down the object. After a moment it stopped. With another loud beep, the light reformed itself into a new shape, one that Jaal speechless.

With a single glance, the world Jaal knew turned on its head.  For the longest time, he stared at the hologram projected over the object, before turning to look at the Moshae, eyes wide.

“Moshae,” he said slowly after he regained the use of his voice. “Is that what  I think  it is?”

She nodded.

Jaal stepped forward slowly  until he was directly  in front of the object, reaching out with hesitant fingers to touch the hologram, the purple pixels rippling before returning to its original shape.

It was an alien.

His first impression was how small they were, quickly followed by how fragile looking. Their body was shaped like angara with two legs, two arms, and two eyes, but the similarities ended there.  The legs were bizarre, looking spindly and unstable with plantigrade feet and lacking the extra joint.

“The official report has her listed as ‘The Asset’,” the Moshae said. In the silence of the room, it sounded  overly  loud. “But we’ve opted to call her Evi.”

“Her?”

“From what little we’ve been able to see from the scans, she has reproductive organs similar to that of angara who carry young,” Torsaan chimed in. Both he and the Moshae joined Jaal, taking up positions on either side, the purple light of the projection casting an almost ethereal light her upturn face. “We have to do an autopsy to be sure of course, but…” He trailed off, his face taking a downward cast. “It  just  seems right.”

Jaal had to agree. Movement out of the corner of his eye captured his attention. Lahren stood a respectful distance away, her hands clasped before her.

“Forgive me for the interruption,” the assistant said, “But I wanted to ask… My sister, Nahfezia, is the caretaker of the Temple of the Sun here on Aya. Maybe it’s not appropriate with Evi being an alien, but I wanted to ask if perhaps if it would be alright to invite her here. You know, once the autopsy is complete.”

“For what purpose?” he inquired, with a curious tilt of his head.

She glanced at the pod behind them, her words coming out in a rush.  “There’s no way to know who she was or her religious beliefs - if she had any at all – but I thought perhaps we could give her a blessing? Maybe  it’s foolish, but it would give me comfort to offer this, insignificant as it is.”

The Moshae considered the nervous assistant for several moments. She looked as conflicted as he felt.  It was a genuine offer that spoke volumes of Lahren’s character, her compassion for the alien moving her to offer something so personal. But even so, Jaal was reluctant to allow it.  Evfra flat out would not simply because of the security risks it would involve, and he was here to act in the commander’s stead. As his heart warred with his mind the assistant spoke again.

“I understand if the answer is no, but I would like to add that my sister has taken vows of silence regarding final rites. She would be the soul of discretion, I promise you.”

“If she is willing to do this, I will allow it,” the Moshae said at last. “On the condition that she consents to be under guard.”

“That won’t be a problem, I assure you.” She shot them a bright smile. “I’ll ask her right away!”

“Evfra is not going to be happy about this,” he said lowly as he watched the assistant scurry away.

“I will handle Evfra. For now, make yourself useful and find Ivhfri.”

Jaal balked. Ivfri was an oddity and not a particularly pleasant one.  Despite his skill as one of the Resistance’s best codebreakers, he was still regarded with distrust and distaste in equal measure by most of his peers, simply on account of his being Kadaran. His abrasive and occasionally outright hostile nature did him no favors.

But despite this, his incredible work ethic and dedication to his job was begrudgingly regarded with some respect; there was a reason he was one of the best. In all that he did, he did with single-minded determination and indomitable focus. Jaal still detested him almost as much as Akksul.

“Is his presence  truly  necessary?”

“Yes, it is,” she said sternly.  “The pod can only be opened by a specific frequency, something we cannot do without knowledge of the language. Ivhfri is the only one with the skills to decipher it.”

“Are you certain that course of action is safe?”

Torsaan barked a laugh. “Safe? Nothing is safe, lad, surely you’re old enough to know that. The only safe thing is to blow it to pieces! No, no. We  just  need the right frequency and we’ll get this open.”

He sighed deeply. Dealing with the foul-tempered codebreaker was an ordeal in and of itself.  Resigning himself to the unpleasant task, he pulled up his omni-tool and walked outside.

* * *

Ivhfri tapped impatiently at the console in front of the pod, the orange glow of the HUD giving his yellow skin – a rarity on Aya - a strange cast. Lines of code scrolled dizzyingly fast over the four screens he had commandeered upon his arrival, moving far too quickly for Jaal’s translator to decipher.

“How much longer is this going to take?” Torsaan asked impatiently from his spot across from the codebreaker.

Ivhfri shot him a venomous glare. “Longer if you keep interrupting me,” he snapped back.

“Kett codes don’t take your people this long to decipher. And these,” the doctor stabbed a finger at the screens, “are alien codes. Don’t see why this is giving you so much trouble.”

“We’ve studied Kett codes for years,” Ivhfri said with a long-suffering sigh.  “Unless you’re about to pull an AI out of your ass to help speed things up then I  strongly  suggest you shut your mouth and let me work .”

The doctor took a step forward presumably to strike him. Jaal threw an arm out to halt his advance.  With a warning shake of his head, Torsaan returned to his original spot, narrowed eyes focused on Ivhfri .

“Is there anything that can  be done  to assist?” The Moshae inquired.

“No,” he answered, “I’m just about done analyzing the possible inputs. The problem here is the code is in language so foreign even my software is barely sufficient to decipher it, with a ridiculously complicated syntax. I’ve got a recursive search going but that’s going to take a few minutes.”

His fingers flew over the holographic keypad. Occasionally he would growl out a rude swear but otherwise did not stop in his work. Finally, the screens stopped, flashing green.

“Gotcha, you skutting vehshaanan!  It’s a security override,” he said, ignoring Torsaan’s indignant reprimand of ‘_language_!’ “  Just  have to run it through the program here…”

Ivhfri flicked his fingers, beckoning over his personal drone. Activating its scanner, it focused on a spot near the top of the pod. An orange HUD appeared, overlaying the smooth metal.  Everyone in the room watched with bated breath as alien characters scrolled up the display. The script was unlike one he had ever seen before, but no less fascinating. Eventually, the scrolling stopped, changing to a flashing display of three strings of characters.

A hissing noise subsequently followed by a sudden puff of freezing air was expelled from cleverly hidden vents located near the bottom of the pod. Everyone in attendance both waited with rapt attention.  The soft mechanical whirring was the only thing to break the silence as the near-invisible seam Jaal had noticed from before became much more prominent. With a steady hum, the lid lifted slowly to reveal the contents within.

The scans had been accurate the detailing of their form but some of the more subtle details had been lost; logically  he knew what to expect, as it turned out it was not enough to have prepared Jaal for seeing them in the flesh.

They were much more subdued in coloring when compared to the vibrancy of angara.  Their smooth skin reminded him of the flowers of the elmohk trees that surrounded his family’s home, their pale petals blooming only during Havarl’s night cycle. Evi’s skin was just a shade or so darker than those flowers, the smooth expanse interrupted occasionally by small brown spots, randomly scattered like stars, most prominent over the bridge of her nose. From her small head were threadlike growths, the individual strands a rich brown that was mimicked on the same little bushy growths over her eyes. Most striking, however, were the four scars under her left eye, deep and red, extending back toward her ear.

His eyes traveled up the lean muscle of Evi’s arm, trailing over the slender bone.  Six even cuts, three on each side,  were sliced into the thin skin of her long, frightening fragile-looking throat.

Her torso was also scarred.  Two deep incisions, equally as red as the scarring on her face, began from the small shoulders to meet at a point between two fleshy mounds, before coming together into a singular one that cut deeply in a straight line down the abdomen before coming to a stop between her hipbones.

“Motherless bastards,” Torsaan swore. "What a mess. Butchery, plain and simple.” The doctor’s eyes were deeply saddened as he looked over at the still body. “No regard for life, or the dead for that matter. But we’ll change that. Sjefa, I need you over here please.”

Evi was removed from the pod and laid upon a metal examination table. It made her seem even smaller, displayed as she was under the bright lights buzzing overhead.  Rather than the typical excitement that came with most new discoveries, the mood of the lab was somber as they continued their study. Evi had 206 bones and 650 muscles, possessing one heart, two lungs, a large brain, and a complex nervous system.  Jaal had never really had an interest in biology but he knew enough to recognize the similarities of their own physiology.

“These incisions are deep, precise,” Torsaan said quietly some hours later after having dismissed the assistants. He passed Jaal a datapad upon which was a close-up anatomical image of Evi’s throat. “Do you see this muscle here? Like ours it the one that vibrates the vocal cords. They’ve been severed. The cut was clean at least.”

Jaal’s glanced at her throat, then back to the pad in his hand his brow knit with confusion. “I do not understand. What purpose would that serve? Wouldn’t the damage leave her unable to speak?”

“She has increased levels of adrenaline and catecholamine and adrenocorticotropic hormones.” Jaal looked at him blankly.

“I was never one for biology. What do these increased levels mean?”

“The adrenocorticotropic hormone is responsible for essentially kickstarting the adrenal gland,” the Moshae answered flatly, “while catecholamine is what prepares the muscles for the fight or flight response.”

Jaal‘s heart stopped. “ Surely  you don’t mean –“

“She was awake when the Kett cut her open.” Torsaan’s mouth twisted in disgust. “Easier to work on a silenced subject.”

That was too much for Jaal.  Clamping a hand over his mouth he quickly stepped back from the table to lean heavily against the wall, leaning over with his hands on his knees, breathing deeply through sudden nausea.

His heart broke for her, this little stranger from beyond the stars. She’d died alone and afraid at the hands of monsters.  If the kett are capable of such brutality against her, what horrors were being inflicted on their own people? The thought was almost too much to bear. He rubbed a hand over his tired face, the stress of travel and the day’s revelations starting to catch up to him.

There was a quiet knocking at the door before it opened to a small angaran woman. She was beautiful, with large eyes and deep purple skin. Lahren followed close behind.

“You must be Nahfezia,” the Moshae said. She inclined her head.

“I am. My sister has told me little about why I am here, beyond that I would be giving someone last rites.”

“The recipient is… not one you would be familiar with.”

The priestess smiled serenely. “It does not matter. It is not my place to cast judgment or question. Please, who am I seeing?”

Torsaan stepped out of the way of the table, his bulk concealing Evi.

Her eyes widened in surprise.  After a long moment, she reached into the satchel on her shoulder to bring out a soft-looking blanket, the fabric a near-identical blue as his rofjinn. A quiet hush fell over the lab as the priestess carefully tucked it around Evi’s body, her movements tender. It was not a necessary part of the ritual, Jaal knew. There were many religions among their people; his true father had followed the way of the sun. Before he had disappeared, he had taught Jaal his faith but did not press it upon him.  Faith was something one had to decide for themselves and Jaal had always been quite conflicted about it. And with the discovery of Evi? It left him more confused than before.

She cradled Evi’s face in gentle hands, tipping it up to the light as she leaned down to whisper the prayers of last rites. The ritual was performed with all the respect she had been denied in life.  On instinct, Jaal reached out and took hold of her much smaller one, his thumb stroking across the back of her battered knuckles. She was shockingly cold to the touch, no doubt from the chill of the cryo-freezing of the pod. Whoever Evi had been was long gone, alone among strangers who didn’t even know her true name. As his eyes trailed over her face, he could not help but wonder. Were there more like her out there? Encaged by the Kett, the subjects of vile experiments, alone and afraid? He hoped not. Just the thought of all that darkness… His grip tightened before he let go and stepped back.  A comforting hand came to rest on his shoulder, but even that silent gesture of solidarity wasn’t enough to help the heaviness of his heart.

She left as  quietly  as she came, not before making arrangements with the Moshae for Evi’s body as soon as their studying was complete. The scientists returned to their business as Jaal attended to his own, filing his report and reviewing other correspondence that required his attention. It truly was a neverending beast, and to Jaal, it felt that much more so with his inability to concentrate on the task at hand. It wasn’t easy to get so much of a glimpse of her with the battery of tests being performed but after many hours, even they reached the point of exhaustion for a break and take care of the physical needs of the body. Jaal stayed behind, with assurances he too would eventually get some food.

* * *

And then they were alone.

“I am sorry,” he said, for lack of anything else.  The words that so usually came so easily had escaped him here in the quiet lab; even if they hadn’t, Jaal wasn’t sure he would have known what to say if there even was something that could encapsulate the feelings he experienced. He stood beside her for some time before being interrupted by the loud growling of his stomach.

He’d  just  pressed his hand to the panel to open the door when he heard it; a huge gasp followed by a thud.

Without thinking, he reached for his rifle with practiced movements and spun around into a crouch, the scanner over his eye coming to life to process the information of the surrounding environment.

The table was empty.

Time seemed to slow as he looked wide-eyed at Evi slumped on the floor, having fallen to the floor with her back to him, sucking in air as if she couldn’t get enough. Carefully, Jaal knelt, setting his rifle to the side. Her increasingly rapid breathing was worrisome.  Later on, Jaal would never be able to say what motivated him to lay his hand on her back; perhaps an instinct to comfort someone in distress? Whatever it was it turned out to be the wrong thing to do.

She froze under his touch and with a clumsy scramble rolled away from him to scramble to their feet. She overbalanced, flailing wildly only to catch her arm of the edge of the table, the corner slicing deep.  Red bloomed and oozed thick and viscous, splattering on the floor as she tried to put as much space between the two of them. But in the sterile lab, there was no place to hide. Her head whipped side to side,  clearly  looking for an escape. There were no windows in the lab and only two exits. The obvious one being at his back and the other, hidden escape route.

She lunged the left, grabbing a scalpel, brandishing it in clear warning when he took a step forward. His hands came up in a gesture for peace.  It did not seem to pacify her; Evi backed away until she'd wedged herself in the far corner between another table and a large cabinet.

She’d been  unnervingly  silent throughout the ordeal. The lines at her throat were raw looking and likely quite painful. Slowly so as to not frighten the alien further Jaal knelt in front of her several feet away, making sure to keep his hands where she could see them.

The long mass that grew from her head obscured much of her face, the dark strands more mobile than he’d thought.  It  truly  was thread-like, the individual strands so thin he couldn't even begin to consider their function. With one hand, she shoved it back over her shoulder presumably to clear their field of vision.  Black pupils were blown wide, around which was a thin band of color; a lush deep green similar to the dense flora of Havarl, startling against the white sclera, surrounded by thin feathery strands.

Earlier the Moshae and Torsaan both had discussed the possible intelligence of Evi. For all they knew she had no more mind than that of an adhi. But as Jaal knelt before the trembling alien it was clear it possessed an intelligent mind.  There was an awareness that peeked through the terror, something recognizable in something so alien.

“Paavoa, little one,” he said gently, with the same tone he used to calm the youngest members of his family. Hopefully, it would convey what he was trying to say. “I am not going to hurt you. There is nothing to fear.”

There was no comprehension at his words although she did tilt their head to the side, listening. Petal pink lips parted but all that came out was a soft, puh of air. She tried again with the same result. Her face twisted with agitation as she struggled to speak to no avail.

“Calm yourself. You are safe.”

She remained stock still as she kept a white-knuckled grip on the scalpel, meeting his gaze readily, chin held high in what he thought might be defiance. If she was able to put on a show of bravado in the face of uncertainty, then perhaps there was some hope of eventual communication.

“My name is Jaal Ama Darav,” he said slowly, pressing his hand against his chest. “Jaal,” he said again.

Something shifted in her eyes. Wariness, fear, anger – and most importantly– comprehension. Her own hand came up to their chest, lips parting to speak. Nothing came out. Before he could stop her she reached up with trembling fingers to touch her throat.

Lips parted in a silent cry.  The scalpel dropped to the floor with a dull chime, both hands coming up to investigate the livid scarring. Jaal felt helpless. He could only watch as they tried to speak, spiraling further into a panic when not a single sound came forth.

“Easy,” he said, struggling to maintain an even voice. “Hush. You are going to hurt yourself.” He kept his tone soft and calm, doing his best to soothe their distress. It was no easy thing. He managed to catch their eye and he took long, exaggerated breaths.

“Yes, like that,” he encouraged, as they struggled to mimic him, “Slow and steady. Breathe. You are safe here, safe with me.”

They continued the breathing exercise as Jaal stepped back to retrieve the blanket that had fallen in their earlier mad scramble as well as a roll of bandages. He laid them in the space between them. She looked at it suspiciously. Pointing to the bandages he mimed wrapping it around his arm.

With shaking hands, she snatched it, the angle awkward as she tried to bind it. It was not going well at all. He did try to reach out to assist but she bared her teeth in a snarl and pushed back into the corner.  With one end clamped between her teeth, she managed to wrap the wound in a passable bandage, then dragged the blanket forward to swing it over her shoulders. In any other circumstance, the visual would have been quite comical; the blanket had been designed with angaran sizes in mind, and as such completely swallowed her smaller frame.

They stayed staring at each other for a long time, long enough for his legs to begin to ache from the awkward position. But he dared not move. When he had reached the point where he was convinced he could stand it no more when she moved.

So very  slowly  she pulled her uninjured arm from under her blanket to extend it palm up. Without question, he took it, pausing when she flinched, before pulling her up with him. Evi swayed stiffening when he steadied her but otherwise made no threatening moves.

Jaal led her back to the table whereupon he lifted her to sit on it once more. Her waist was so small that his hands nearly spanned the width of it.  Instead of dwelling on it, he busied himself with rummaging through the various supplies. Finally, he found the telltale tubes of nutrient paste and after selecting several, he returned to offer one with what he hoped was a reassuring smile.

Evi eyed it suspiciously but accepted all the same. She turned it over inspecting the shiny packaging, even bringing it to her nose to smell.

“It is food.” She looked back blankly. “Food,” he repeated slower, emphasizing the word. Nothing. Making sure he had their full attention, he opened one of the packets himself and squeezed out a mouthful.  A flash of inspiration; thumb touching the tips of his other fingers he brought it to his lips and tapped them against his mouth.

“Food,” he said clearly, repeating the sign.

She cocked her head and hesitantly signed it back. Jaal beamed and nodded encouragingly. She signed the word again before tearing into it. Very quickly the tube was emptied. It took four more before she  was satisfied, stacking the emptied ones beside her neatly. Her unwavering stare was a little unnerving. Still, he pressed on. He held up his palms then turned them out towards her.

“Done,” he said clearly. And like before she mimicked it, green eyes calculating.

Jaal wasn’t sure what to feel.  He was adamant in his feeling that Evi was a victim of the Kett’s brutality as opposed to being affiliated with them, a gut feeling would not be enough to satisfy Evfra.  Already he could hear the taciturn commander demand an immediate investigation into whatever background that could be found to rule out any sort of ties to the kett.

In his heart of hearts. he knew she was not.  Even though Evi was alien, an outsider, not one of their own, she too suffered at the hands of their would-be conquerors.

As he looked into her eyes, his resolve for the Resistance strengthened.  There were many beyond counting in need of justice for the crimes committed by the Kett – and with this new discovery, perhaps more than they’d ever dreamed.

The angara were longer alone in this galaxy of theirs, the fight becoming much more. No longer was it just for his own but for her unknown people.  Although Jaal may never meet another in this lifetime, he hoped that they knew that there were strangers beyond the stars who stood with them, wherever it was they were.


	2. Welcome to Heleus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry Tessa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the heavy dialogue. It picks up in the next chapter, I promise!

Silence.

A silence so deep it was near deafening, the kind that sunk deep into her very core, impossible to understand and fight against even if she had the mental capacity to even attempt such a thing. It permeated this place, accompanied only by a river of iridescent light that twisted and churned through an unfathomable void, interspersed with pinpricks of weak starlight that all at once seemed close enough to touch and impossibly far away.

Perhaps it should have been frightening, but too much of herself was scattered to feel more than indifferent – it just simply was. In this place of suspended animation, she simply existed. There was no pain. There was no joy. All that existed in this place was silence and river of light that cradled her.

Awareness came in slow increments, her consciousness wavering in between the hazy line of deep sleep and full awareness, the process slow and smooth as molasses. She was surrounded by a humming she felt rather than heard; her thoughts were too slippery to grasp and as soon as she’d had the thought it was already gone, leaving her once more to her drifting

_Good evening, Tessa. How are you feeling?_

It took a long moment to process who was speaking; the familiar modulated voice bringing her closer to the edge of awareness.

Ah. SAM.

The AI stirred; the presence of another in her head so utterly alien that she mentally balked. Tessa hadn’t had much time to acclimate to the AI. Less than a month after the installation of the chip that linked her to SAM node, she and the crew assigned to the Nexus had departed the Milky Way to prepare for the arrival of the five arks to follow.

_That is correct. I function as the mission computer for the Pathfinder team. _

SAM was silent for a long moment, long enough for her to wonder if he had gone offline.

_I am still functioning at full capacity, _the AI reassured.

Her throat hurt. Her chest hurt, _everything ­_hurt. Why did it hurt? She swallowed reflexively and the action sent a jolt of pain. As quickly as it had come it was muted before settling into a dull ache.

_Please do not try to speak. You have sustained several injuries and speaking will hinder the healing process. Think, and I will hear you._

A mind-reading AI? Only Dad would come up with that.

_Thoughts emerge because of differences in electrical potential from chemical reactions, transmitted via neurons that have synapses which have dendrites, _he said smoothly. _The implant installed in your brain is what allows me to ‘listen.’ _

Stars, she really, really hoped there was coffee in her near future; she was nowhere near awake enough for this.

_You have arrived in Andromeda. However, there have been extenuating circumstances that have resulted in a premature connection._

“Premature connection -? Hang on. You said I’ve been injured,” she thought – _that_ wasn’t weird or anything – “Has something gone wrong with the Nexus?”

_You have been in cryostasis for 630 years. The launch of both the Nexus and the first wave of the arks successful. Thus far their journey has been uninterrupted except for the Nexus._

Well, shit.

They’d anticipated complications, “they” being the brains behind the whole Initiative, for a trip across dark space in cryostasis. Not just any trip, it was The Trip, with a capital T, the biggest journey ever attempted by any Milky Way species. Of course, there were be bound to be problems. The brains had done their best to plan for almost every possible scenario they could think of, but it was another galaxy. There were a billion little things that could go wrong. Like now, apparently.

“What happened?”

_293 Citadel standard days ago the Nexus experienced a brief power surge that temporarily compromised several systems, including the cryo-bay. The surge triggered the emergency ejection of several stasis pods before being brought back online, including your own. Your pod triggered a signal that pulled me from standby in order to monitor the situation. _

“But SAM node is on the Hyperion,” she interrupted. “I’m Nexus crew. How is that possible?”

_“I am physically located in a server bank installed in SAM Node aboard the Ark Hyperion, but quantum entanglement technology allows instant communication anywhere,” _he answered patiently. _Your implant allows a two-way connection_. E_ven though you preceded the Hyperion, you and I remain linked._

They’d covered it in one of the last training sessions, she remembered, just before the Nexus launch.

_As you are no doubt aware, each Ark houses a SAM specifically attuned to their respective Pathfinder, _he answered._ My counterparts and I maintained a low-level awareness during the journey, with regularly scheduled periods of full awareness. One year before the arrival of each ark, each of my counterparts was programmed to come online as a precaution. _

The VI in charge of the Nexus had a similar protocol to manually start waking up the techs in charge of easing the Nexus skeleton crew to start construction.

“You say your counterparts as if you’re not one of them. Aren’t you all from the same code dad designed?”

_Correct. Alec worked alongside each species’ Pathfinder to better attune them to their individual physiology. But Alec made further adjustments, altering the safety protocols of the implants, as well as creating one he did not disclose to the Initiative leadership._

That was her father: Alec Ryder, N7, Biotic, AI engineer, Keeper of Secrets Great and Small, Adder of the Secret Sauce.

_Precisely. Prior to the launch of the Nexus, Alec altered my awareness protocols to activate outside of the scheduled awareness periods should the need arrive if you or your brother were in danger. _

She shouldn’t have been surprised. The man was emotionally constipated, somewhat distant in his own family unit which simultaneously revolved around him, but he loved his wife and his kids fiercely, even though he’d had no idea how to say it. Not verbally anyway. Actions spoke louder than words, he was fond of saying, so it followed that he would show it in the most practical way possible. Including putting his kids before the mission, it seemed.

_This protocol was initiated when I received an alert regarding the emergency ejection of your stasis pod. With your being in stasis, I was unable to make verbal contact with you as I am now. A fact which changed when your pod was intercepted, and you were removed._

Her mind spun. Ejected into space, abducted by aliens, and removed from the safety of her pod? There was no contingency plan for this. She was – it was - No. No, no, no, no, no.

Her chest tightened as panic made her heart race, fear cloying and choking, only to dissipate as a rush of calm flooded over her.

“SAM? What just happened?”

_As I said before, Alec overrode the safety protocols. This change allows me unrestricted access to the Pathfinder’s physiology in which I generate and alter electrical signals along my host’s neural pathways that the body processes as its own._

“So, you can just take over?” she demanded. “Am I just a meat suit for an AI battery then?”

_Your implant connects not to not only the nervous system, but circulation, endocrine function, and exteroceptive senses –_

“That’s not what I asked.”

_I have full access to your physiology, but this does not make you a ‘meat suit’. Ours is a symbiotic relationship. As a new form of AI, I have a direct understanding of the human experience, which allows me to grow beyond the bounds of logical programming. In return, I provide an enhancement to my host by acting as a force multiplier, dramatically enhancing your motor and neural skills when required. _

Coffee. She really, really, _really, _needed coffee for this information overload.

With her brain thoroughly melting out her ears she switched gears. Injuries she could understand. She’d gotten a lot of them in her career.

“You said I was injured. How?”

The AI was quiet for a long, long time. When he finally spoke again his tone was much more subdued.

_You sustained the life-threatening trauma during the three Citadel standard months you spent in their custody. You were clinically dead for twenty-two seconds, whereupon to preserve your body for further study, the aliens returned you to the pod. Before the stasis systems were reactivated, I was able to restart your heart._

“The aliens tried to kill me then?”

_Not intentionally. _

“But I died anyway.”

_…Yes._

“Why don’t I remember waking up?”

_The experience was traumatic, _the AI replied. _The human brain is naturally equipped with the ability to block painful memories in order to protect itself. With the injuries you sustained in their custody, I believed the shock of them would be too much for your mind to handle immediately. By simulating the process, I was able to temporarily block the memories of the events._

“You did _what?!_”

_Please understand that it was not a decision I made lightly, _he insisted. Or as much as he could with his modulated tone. _The physical trauma you sustained was significant; any additional stress would severely hinder your recovery time. _He paused. _If it is any sort of comfort, my primary objective is the survival of the Pathfinder. You are in no danger from me._

“Why do you keep saying Pathfinder? Dad is the Pathfinder.”

SAM didn’t answer immediately. If he – it was too impersonal – were human she’d say he’d hesitated. Could AI hesitate?

_When Alec applied the additional protocol regarding you and your brother, he did not specify how I should react to the situation, _he said carefully. _While I maintained the standard access to you, there was only so much I could do to assist. By transferring the Pathfinder role, I was able to take a much more active role in your survival. It was admittedly a risky decision, but one that has proven effective in keeping you alive._

This was insane. She’d inhaled too much happy gas prior to launch, that had to be it. It was all just an extremely weird, Alice down the rabbit hole levels of weird, vivid insane dream.

“But it’s not permanent, right? When Dad wakes up, he gets to take over again.”

Silence.

“SAM,” she said warningly. “Tell me this is temporary.”

_In the 22 seconds you were clinically dead, I initiated the emergency transfer. However, the previous physical trauma you sustained in addition to the stress on your heart, the connection overloaded your implant and caused a seizure. _

“That doesn’t explain why this isn’t temporary.”

_The seizure complicated the transfer. While successful, we are now linked in a way that any attempt to untangle us would kill you. You are the new human Pathfinder._

The sheer absurdity of it had completely wiped away any sort of anger she’d been feeling before, leaving her with a shocked, hollow feeling. For a long moment, she’d felt betrayed. How the hell was this even possible? Sure, she’d always known Alec had been infamous for pushing boundaries – it had ended his Alliance career for fuck's sake! – but this was a whole new height of insane.

Her brilliant, emotionally constipated, insane father had created the most advanced AI in the galaxy and then poked around it some more to give himself more of an edge.

As soon as she found him, she was going to have a word with her father. Or two. Most likely with a lot of yelling intermixed with some choice profanity.

_I find myself wishing that Alec had been more forthcoming regarding my capabilities. As it is a pointless wish, since the past cannot be altered, I would like to ask how I might be able to assist in your adjustment to the new nature of our relationship._

“SAM, this is… this is a lot. Stars, I have no idea where to even begin to figure this out because this is… holy shit.”

_ I am ready and willing to answer any other questions you may have._

She was really going to miss coffee.

“Where am I now?”

_You are currently in Heleus Cluster of the Andromeda galaxy, in the custody of the Angara. _

“Are they the ones who hurt me?”

_Negative. Your pod was collected by a race called the Kett. I do not believe them to be native to the cluster despite maintaining a significant presence. What little I have been able to decipher of the Kett language, the two races are currently at war._

Fan-fucking-tastic. The Initiative wasn’t an army. They weren’t stupid, they had brought former soldiers and weapons, but nothing with any real firepower. At the time she’d thought it was a mistake. She hated being proved right.

“I assume I’ve gotten here before the Nexus?”

_Correct. It is currently 2816, _he confirmed. _Assuming it continues its current course without any further incidents, the Nexus should arrive in Andromeda by 2818._

“Two _years?_ SAM how the _hell_ did I end up two fucking years ahead of the Nexus? That isn’t possible.”

_The power surge altered its_ _course_, he answered._ Without access to its systems, I am unable to correct its course._

“But it’s still coming, right? It’s not just lost somewhere.”

_It is still coming, Tessa. You will not be alone for very long._

“Alright, fine. We’ll table that for now. What does this mean for me then?”

_The Angara do not bear you any ill-will. You are in a lab on one of their occupied worlds and have been removed from stasis. While their scientists studied you, I was able to run in the background enough to observe your surroundings, while maintaining you in a low-level coma._

_“_Don’t tell me they think I’m dead.”

_A necessary precaution._

“It’s pretty difficult to fake death. Their equipment had to have picked up something. Or, you know, notice me breathing.”

_It was a simple matter of manipulating their scans. As for your breathing –_

“Nope,” she cut him off. “I don’t think I can digest anything else.”

_As you wish._

Her toes were cold. She focused on them, willing them to move. It felt like they did, but without being able to see she wasn’t sure. Slowly sensation began to return, bit by bit. She was laying on something uncomfortable. Metal maybe? It felt like it anyway. It wasn’t cold like she’d expect a metal table would feel, but that probably had to do with whatever was draped over her. A blanket? Whatever it was it was sinfully soft and very warm.

He’d said she was in a lab. It smelled like a lab; that sharp scent of antiseptic and cold, but there were others she couldn’t identify, smells she had no name for.

The humming was louder now, accompanied by random beeping and other machinery. At least it sounded like machinery.

“This is insane.”

_It is understandably difficult to comprehend._

“You're fine,” She said automatically. “Actually no, it’s not fine. This hurts like hell. You’ve done a lot to help me, and I really am a fan of being alive, but this whole situation… this isn’t fine SAM. I have no idea how it’s going to be fine at all. I’m stranded three years ahead of the Nexus, on an alien planet in a galaxy without any species I’m familiar with. I’ve already been experimented on by one species and am currently being held by another one that may or may not be the good guys. And I’ve got an AI in my head who made me Pathfinder in order to save my life because Dad juiced you up beyond the Initiative’s rules that could probably fry my brain! This whole clusterfuck isn’t _fine_.”

This was a fucking nightmare. Nothing in the training had prepared her for something like this. There was no training in the world that could prepare anyone for this. So much could happen within three years. The Nexus had already experienced a power surge; who’s to say it wouldn’t have another one? What if they never made it to Andromeda? What if the arks got lost in dark space? Never seeing her dad or Scott again. God, Scotty. It was her job to protect him! She couldn't do that if he wasn't in the same galaxy!

What if she would be the only human in Heleus? Before she could spiral into the beginning of an anxiety attack, SAM chimed in.

_I would like to reassure you that my priority is to keep you safe. I will not fry your brain. _

His tone was so bland she couldn’t help but smile.

_There is a potential benefit to this situation._

"You're joking."

_I am not. Although, if you would be amenable, humor is a skill I have yet to master. Would you like to hear a joke?_

"Humor isn't a skill... You know what? Sure. But later. What has you seeing the silver lining here?"

_The purpose of the Pathfinder is to not only find a home for your people but also act as the ‘face’ of the Initiative, particularly regarding first contact. You have been through first contact training. As acting Pathfinder, it would be appropriate to establish first contact with the Angara and begin the foundation of a relationship between them and the Initiative. _

“So, by the time the Nexus arrives, trust will have already been built, as long as everything doesn’t go pear-shaped in the next three years.”

_Affirmative._

He had a point. She looked back up at the ceiling as she contemplated his words. It wasn’t a bad idea really. And it’s not like anyone in the Initiative could blame her if (when she told herself firmly) arrived. Besides, wouldn’t it a good thing for them to show up to friendly faces? That was the plan all along, right? Peaceful habitation with the new neighbors?

And if it all went wrong, she’d be responsible for a hostile introduction that could potentially cost an irreplaceable amount of lives. But if it worked…

The idea was exciting. She’d come to Andromeda for a fresh start away from the bullshit of the Milky Way, to have an adventure and explore places no human had ever been before. It was the chance of a lifetime! Being able to establish a rapport with the Angara would be an amazing thing for the Initiative.

“Are you sure this is a good idea? It’s a huge risk.”

_I have run various scenarios and calculations regarding this situation –_

“I’m not looking for a percentage SAM. Do you this is a good idea?”

_I am certain is it the best option available right now._

“I appreciate your honesty. This whole thing is unbelievable. I’m not used to taking a leap of faith like this – and that’s basically what this is, isn’t it? A scary one. But that’s kind of a requirement for pursuing the unknown.”

_A sentiment Alec would agree with wholeheartedly._

“I bet he would.”

_If you are prepared, now would be the time to wake-up._

There was a shuffling sound alarmingly close; her heart pounded in her chest loud as a drum at the unknown that had arrived whether she liked it or not.

_We are in this together, Tessa,_ SAM said quietly, his voice usually scrubbed of any emotional inflection, flavored by what she would almost name as compassion.

With a firm nod, (stars, it felt good to move again) Tessa took a deep breath. Whatever was coming she’d face it head-on. She was a Ryder, and Ryders didn’t back down from anything.

* * *

When she looked back on the whole experience far in the future she’d cringe about the incredibly ungraceful introduction to the Angara, but to be fair, a giant pink alien randomly touching her did warrant a little panic.

She’d banned SAM from sharing the memory with Scott just in case.

**Author's Note:**

> Next time: how the actual fuck did Tessa survive this whole ordeal?


End file.
